Have You Tried Flash (Speed) Mentoring Yet?

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When I started Twomentor a year and several months ago, my intention was (and is) to go in and help companies build mentoring cultures for so many reasons. I had already spoken with 500- 600 companies and institutions that were struggling with hiring and retaining diverse talent, especially in the Science, Tech, Engineering and Math (STEM) arena. Not one company would disagree that culture and employee engagement needed focus + leaders understood that the economics of loss are troubling, especially when you factor in that it can cost @ one year salary to replace an executive, over 200% for a key Sales executive, and that Millennials — well, 21% left their jobs last year costing companies billions.

Did you know- Over 75% of Millennials view being mentored as crucial to their professional success? Did you know most women leave their jobs because they do not have a Sponsor (advocate, inner champion).

So I landed at a Leadership Conference in Chennai, India last February at an NGO Leadership Conference through the Center for Social Leadership & Sevalaya, and decided to take concepts such as reverse mentoring, peer mentoring, diverse mentoring, and integrate them into what has now become The Twomentor – Mentor Road Trip™ Experience. I didn’t realize at the time, how powerful this would be for participants and the places it would take me personally as a new CEO.

So what does it look like? Well, let’s hit the gas…

Mile Seven: So you are driving in your car with your awesome new mentor. (or mentee)… clear blue skies ahead… Starbucks double espresso warms your hand (or perhaps you prefer Dunkin Donuts). You have an updated Spotify playlist for background music, a GPS and a full tank of gas. Then … Uh-ho! Flat tire.

Twomentor: “Flat tires happen in our professional lives. Sometimes, it is our batteries that need to be recharged. I now want you to share a professional challenge big or small that you are having right now with your mentor. Take 10 minutes on this leg of our journey together…”

At Leadership Greater Washington, at the World Bank Group, at Women in Technology and a huge packed ballroom in Vegas for InfoComm International and Watermark Executive Women’s Conference in San Jose, we have run these customized experiences. The proverbial conference spotlight moves from the stage to shine a light within the audience. We transform and we become each other’s mentors, consultants, we light up realizing others in this multi-cultural, multi-generational environment have insights, perspective and solutions. No longer are we passively staring at the stage, we are now engaged, playing our part and creating meaningful interactions. We find commonalities and wish we could continue the conversation for another 30 minutes… but… the bell rings… we now need to switch partners.

Mile Eleven: “For this next segment, friends we want you to find someone in the room that DOES NOT remind you of yourself. Does not look like you (diverse mentoring). Please share with your mentee what drives your passion to do the work you do in tech, engineering, sales… each day.” Let’s Go.

They are listening to each other, heads nodding up and down, understanding, animated. Amazing that no one really knew each other twelve minutes ago. At the Gannett Building in McClean, VA I walk around observing over 60 women through Women of Technology and Women of AT&T going the extra mile for each other. Sparkling, smiling, intent at our post-dinner evening session. I see mentors wear the hat for the first time in years of the mentee. Asking for help from others. So many women I met shared after these sessions that they are always helping and mentoring others, but they were burning out because they were no longer asking others for help… It was a revelation. Senior male and female leaders always want to discuss Sponsorship offline.

“As an over 40 career professional, I was mentored by a Millennial in Twomentor’s workshop. While it was great to learn about my mentor’s passion and hear her advice, what was even more important than the learning was the feeling we experienced. This pairing put me in a position of vulnerability and my mentor in a place of courage. And coming away from this, I realized these emotional states were exactly what each of us needed to grow who we are as career professionals. I needed a beginner’s mind, and she needed a stronger voice. Brilliant!”- Sarita Vasa, Participant

“Shake your partners hand, thank them for the great mentoring and we are ready for the next leg of the journey. Mile Seventeen: We live in a Global economy where new skills are required… Lifelong learning is required. Please share a technology… “

Attendees moved on and then moved on again to Mile 84. The business cards were exchanged, the new connections made, dozens of follow-up coffee dates planned and then we pulled into our rest stop to refuel and say our goodbyes for now… continuing our learning for the day.

Reflecting in the rear-view mirror, Flash mentoring is an effective jump-start to the culture of mentoring at organizations. It does not replace a strong, metrics-based high performing mentoring initiative, it simply revs the engine and can ignite the value-proposition + clarity for groups to get started. A lot of companies are trying a low-touch solution for a high-touch problem. Well, that’s where we come in. Flash mentoring is dynamic, it’s inclusive, and it’s fun whether 40 people are in the room or 1400.

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Julie Kantor is the Founder & CEO of Twomentor LLC and passionate about elevating women in STEM and driving mentoring cultures. You can reach her directly at info@twomentor.com Learn about Twomentor including webinars, peer to peer world cafe learning and much more.

 

10 Professional Discussions Millennials Should Have With Their Mentors

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Co-written with A. Crosser

What is the culture of your organization?

What’s more important to you corporate values, mission or vision?

If you could start your company all over again, what would you have done differently?

Were three of the thoughtfully selected questions asked by a bright young woman named Tong from The Washington Center internship program today as she ponders her career path.

The Millennial generation (born 1980 – 2000) is coming of age, and many of today’s young adults are finding themselves in their first real positions as professionals or on the cusp of starting families. As they graduate college and find jobs in their field, many younger Millennials are looking to their mentors to help guide them through this turning point in their professional lives and help them navigate the somewhat turbulent seas of the workplace.

Millennials face many struggles which are unique to their generation. They have different ambitions, and treat their professional lives differently than those who came before them. They also have Glassdoor.com, Linkedin and many tools that we didn’t have on our quest to rise through the ranks.

PURPOSE OVER PAYCHECK: According to a Deloitte study, 64 percent of Millennials say their personal values have the greatest impact on their decision-making process, and 56 percent of Millennials globally have decided against ever working for a company based on their values and standard of conduct. A second Deloitte study shows that a whopping 87 percent of Millennials believe a company’s success should be determined by more than their financial performance – namely, they believe employee satisfaction should be taken into consideration. This is a major shift in perspective, as many older professionals haven’t placed as much of a premium on where they work or at times the ethics of their company – many only see their job as a way to put food on the table for their family.

What do these statistics mean for newer members of our workforce? Simply put, they indicate lack of guidance in for today’s upcoming professionals, as they live (and drive) a new reality which older generations might not relate to in the same way. They may look at their father who worked in an unethical factory for 20 years of his life, and find no support when they say they don’t want to work there out from a moral standpoint. They might feel some skepticism toward the Baby Boomer professor who has publicly apologized in classrooms for their generation leaving the future with trillions in debt. Millennial women globally face a particularly difficult personal battle, as their mothers and other women in their family may encourage them to marry and have a family instead of pursuing a career. In 1970, only 11 percent of women with college degrees were employed by the labor force — a number which has risen to over 30 percent (in the United States) Women (with and without college degrees today make up almost 50% of the overall workforce in the US.

These statistics indicate a particular need for Millennials — the need for guidance and mentorship. We’re taking a look at the first 10 or 20 professional discussions millennials should have with their mentors in order to get the most out of their mentoring ‘sessions’. By having the discussions listed below, the next generation of young professionals can set themselves on course for great success in their fields. The answers to the questions below will help guide them in the right direction, helping them achieve their professional goals and make a difference in the world. Additionally, we encourage mentors to come up with sets of questions as well. We can all learn from each other and clear the cobwebs that often block us from seeing.

  1. “What do you wish you knew at my stage?”

As we grow and develop new knowledge, we begin to find answers to questions we had during our youth. Had we known these answers earlier in our careers, we may have made smarter or more informed decisions than those we ended up making. One of the best ways to share our accumulated knowledge is with young professionals entering our field, as we can guide them as we wish someone had guided us. If you’re a professional Millennial looking for guidance, ask your mentor what they wish they knew at your age or what they wished a mentor had told them – chances are, you’ll find very useful information that could change the course of your career.

  1. “What were your failures, and how did you learn from them?”

In the same boat as the discussion above, discussing past failure is an excellent way to learn what to avoid, and which paths to take. Part of making mistakes is learning lessons, and lessons should be passed on to others to help them avoid the same mistakes. As was said by Henry Ford ‘Failure is the chance to begin again more intelligently.’ and ‘Failure is neither fatal nor final.’ Here you could have a great conversation on resiliency.

  1. “What would you do differently, if you could start over?”

As successful as your mentor may be, there are probably some scenarios they would do differently if they could go back in time. Ask them about situations which they believe they could have handled more efficiently, or decisions they wish they had or hadn’t made. These answers can help you avoid setbacks to your success, and make wiser decisions in the long-run.

  1. “What do you struggle with?”

Everyone struggles with something, no matter who they are, their age or where they came from. After years of practice, your mentor still struggles with some aspect of their career. Take many professional women in the MENA (Middle East and North Africa) region, for example. While more than half of all University students in the Middle East and North African region are women, they make up only 21 percent of the workforce – largely due to societal demands. Many professional women struggle with raising a family and working in a career (particularly in STEM fields), despite how successful they may appear to others. These women could use their struggles to guide other young women enduring much of the same, to show them that societal demands can be overcome.

  1. “What would you do in my shoes?”

When you’re faced with difficult decisions, the best question you can ask is “what would you do if you were me?” It can be difficult to objectively analyze your situation and come up with the right “next move,” and asking someone who’s faced similar decisions what they would do in your shoes can help you understand what you might consider doing next. Another way to ask this question is “Have you been in a similar situation and how did you handle it?’ We have so much to learn from each other’s stories.

  1. “Describe your most rewarding accomplishment.”

Success has different meanings to different people. In our youth, success looks like fancy cars, Instagram worthy lifestyle and red carpets, but as we age it often takes on a new look. By asking mentors what they believe is their most rewarding accomplishment, you can get an idea of what they value as a result of their experience. You can get a picture of what your long-time goals might evolve into – in fact, your mentor’s answers will more than likely surprise, as they don’t often answer this question with the answers we think we’ll hear.

  1. “What am I doing wrong?”

Everyone wants to be right, but in reality we’re all wrong more often than we’d like to believe. Many times, fixing one or two small aspects of our perspectives, actions, and motives can mean a world of difference for our future. However, it’s challenging to evaluate ourselves as we have a natural tendency to believe we’re always right. Your mentor’s experience will allow them to objectively look at you and tell you what you can do better – for many, this invaluable advice can mean the difference between success and failure. Another way to rephrase this question is to explain a challenging situation and ask “What am I not seeing here about my role?” Reshma Saujani really pushes in her outstanding TED Talk that we encourage girls to be brave not perfect.

  1. “How can I become more productive at work?”

Even the most intelligent of people can fall victim to laziness or burnout. Some of the greatest ideas of all time may have been lost as the result of low-productivity, but even with this knowledge many of us struggle to discipline ourselves and make our dreams a reality. Your mentor has likely struggled with many of the same issues, so ask them to weigh in. It’s like being on a road trip and realizing you are out of gas or are dealing with a flat tire. Most professionals have their own set of productivity tips, so see what kind of advice your mentor has to offer to recharge your batteries. Also, please share with your old-timer (just kidding) some of the technology tools and more that make you more productive. We are big fans of reverse mentoring @Twomentor.

  1. “When you were my age, what were your goals? How have they changed?”

Over time, our goals change. We begin to prioritize certain aspects of our life over others, as we trade all night parties for families and fast food for gluten-free. What once seemed valuable and important can become meaningless overnight, but the striking change can cause fear and anxiety for many as it occurs. Many times, we’re afraid to let ourselves change for the better, as we fear that we may be leaving an important part of ourselves behind. By better understanding how your mentor’s goals have changed, you might become more comfortable as you face similar changes in your own life.

  1. “What traits do I need to succeed in this field?”

Every field has secrets to success – many of which you’ll never learn in a classroom. Medical professionals must be patient and empathetic, while engineers must have laser-sharp focus and an uncanny attention to detail. Artists and entrepreneurs must be both fearless and creative, while athletes must have perseverance. Your mentor can tell you exactly which traits create leaders in your field, and how you can develop them with ‘eye of the tiger’ conviction.

Next week we will share Part Two. 10 More Professional Discussions to Have with Your Mentor… Please follow this blog to alert you when it is posted.

Julie Silard Kantor is CEO of Twomentor, LLC a social impact company dedicated to helping companies retain Millennials and elevate women in STEM fields through mentor training and strategy. She will be chairing the Global Women in STEM Conference in Dubai October 25-26th through the Meera Kaul Foundation and recently presented a speech to 350 Millennials from 85 countries at the United Nations through World Merit360.

NEW DATA: Your Corporate Mentoring Program Will Need More Attention

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Co-written with Kate Ward, Head of Partnerships InHerSight

Mentorship programs get a lot of buzz as the key to improving gender equality in the workplace. As more and more companies look for ways to increase representation of women at senior levels, mentorship or sponsorship is often cited as a key to helping women reach that next rung on the corporate ladder. And many powerful women, such as Sheryl Sandberg, have cited the importance of mentors to their personal career success.

With approximately 75% of Fortune 500 companies offering formal mentoring programs and 25% of U.S medium and large companies offering programs, corporate America has embraced the idea, but are these programs achieving their potential?

Are people being thrown together without a lot of thought to what the experience should be?

Are companies understanding the true business case for mentoring and what it means to all parties?

Do we recognize the act of mentoring, and the people who mentor as the ones who help drive engagement and retention at our companies?

Are mentors and mentees being trained?

We spent some quality time with the dynamic team at workplace review site, InHerSight. They have collected employer ratings from tens of thousands of women. One of the 14 metrics they get feedback on is women’s satisfaction with her company’s “mentorship and sponsorship programs”. We have written a lot about sponsorship in earlier posts. Turns out, at least among women, corporate mentorship programs could really use some work and investment.

A recent review of their data found that “mentorship and sponsorship programs” is the lowest rated metric of all 14 that they capture with an overall score of 2.2 out of 5 stars.

InHerSight’s research also found that a company’s mentorship program is highly correlated with women’s overall satisfaction and happiness at a company, which means if your female employees are unhappy with your mentorship program, they are more likely to be unsatisfied at work.

And here’s where the data was most interesting, a deeper dive showed that women’s satisfaction with their company’s mentorship program is a stronger predictor of overall satisfaction at a company the later women are in their careers.

Our assessment, women as they grow in their careers truly want to see others self-actualize. They also want to build stronger sponsoring relationships to feel validated, supported and championed in their careers.

Julie Kantor is the CEO of Twomentor, LLC a management consulting firm that is passionate about building mentoring cultures to drive retention.

They Got Fired! Would Mentoring Have Saved Them?

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Written by Julie Kantor and Delia Borbone

Today our team sat in the ‘war room’ of Twomentor’s global headquarters (that means, a single office in Bethesda with three summer associates, a consultant and a very fatigued White Havanese pup named Naomi). One of our team members brought to our attention a Inc. magazine article by Alison Green of an unusual and saddening summer internship circumstance. A group of interns did not understand the strict dress code of the company they were working for and decided to submit a proposal asking for minor modifications in the dress code. The company responded by holding a meeting, where all the interns who signed the proposal were terminated.

We scoured through the comments and there were interesting debates on corporate culture, etiquette, and who was the party to blame. But we realized that bottom line, our Millennial and Generation Z workforce are coming to us to learn and be mentored so we want to equip you with 8 recommendations on being an effective mentor:

1] Listen- To be a successful mentor, you must be an attentive listener. This shows that you are genuinely interested in what is going on in your mentee’s life. Listen closely to gain a better understanding of where he/she is coming from, and to help you advise them appropriately. Find out what your mentee knows and what her/his blindspots might be as a newcomer in the working world.

2] Balanced- A mentee comes to you to share news, to ask for advice and opinions, and sometimes to let out their frustrations. Your job is not to agree with everything your mentee says, but to help him/her think rationally about situations and approach them from a level headed perspective. Perhaps an internal mentor would have advised the interns not to develop a signed petition with a greater enlightenment of the corporate culture (we write as we stand here in flip flops and jeans- just kidding!)

3] Trust- Your mentee is going to come to you with all sorts of things, some of which may be personal or things they don’t want shared with others. He/she is telling you this because they trust you and value your advice. This is a great honor. It is imperative to keep conversations confidential and not break your mentee’s trust, unless it is a violation of HR policies or could cause real harm to the individual/company.

4] Be Open and Try Not to Judge- Mentoring requires a willingness to share about your own experiences that relate to your mentee’s queries, and be able to give thoughtful advice. Better yet, if you can lead your mentee to finding his/her own conclusions through your stories. The more open and authentic you are, the more open to sharing your mentee will be as well. You also must be open-minded. Unexpected conversations and situations are very likely, however you are here to help and advise, not judge.

5] Availability- Mentoring is a time commitment, and regular meetings are crucial in developing a good relationship. No matter how much you like your mentee, if you don’t have the time for them it is best to let them know and help them find a different mentor who can devote more time. We move into an era of skills-based mentoring as older generations are learning to pass the baton and embrace reverse mentoring in the workplace.

6] Model- You are being watched. “Just while observing you, mentees pick up many things: ethics, values and standards; style, beliefs and attitudes; methods and procedures. They are likely to follow your lead, adapt your approach to their own style, and build confidence through their affiliation with you. As a mentor, you need to be keenly aware of your own behavior.” (E. Wayne Hart, Forbes.com)

7] Honesty- “If you’re brave enough to ask your mentor for advice, he or she needs to be brave enough to give you a straight answer. If you’re contemplating taking a new job, for instance, and you explain the situation and ask for your mentor’s point of view – he or she should give it to you, unvarnished.” (Erika Andersen, Forbes.com)

8] Goal Oriented- “A good mentor continually sets a good example by showing how his/her personal habits are reflected by personal and professional goals and overall personal success.” (Franchise Growth Partners)

Both the interns and the managers of the company might have approached this situation differently, and ideally with a mentoring lens. Anyone who brings on an intern is onboarding our future workforce and taking the extra steps is often the difference between success and failure (see articles ‘Ready to Go the Extra Mile for Your Interns and ‘Interning With Your Best Foot Forward’). Despite the unfortunate outcome for the interns and company, we know this is a learning opportunity for all involved and all readers. We sincerely hope that they will land well next summer if not sooner with a new viable opportunity.

Twomentor, LLC, is a management consulting firm that provides mentor training, strategy, flash mentoring sessions and global speaking to elevate women and better retain Millennials in the workforce. We believe in mentoring cultures.

Don’t Have Time to Mentor? You Might Want to Rethink That

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“I have talked more people off a ledge from leaving our company,” said Cheryl* CEO to her leadership team. I watched her in awe. She is a true leader who gets the power of people, the power of a pay-it-forward culture. After all, she was part of a strong chain of leaders who championed her and she respectfully claims that honor and wants to see the legacy continue. With the cost of losing an employee is 100–300% salary (SHRM), I cannot help but start putting dollars on a virtual excel spreadsheet for all the casualties that did not happen as a result of her interventions. The value of those authentic talks. The value of taking the time to see the people who work with you, for you, your peeps, your companies future.

Cheryl put a much stronger stake in the ground when she announced that she was connecting bonuses to “how we invest in our people,” with mentoring being one key strategy. She understands that an investment in people = a stronger workplace culture = retention = engagement + productivity = =revenue and ROI= more smiles.

As I took the stage at Cheryl’s conference, Bob’s conference, Darren’s corporate conference and dozens more through my work @Twomentor I always ask the question “How many of you have a mentor and/or someone you go to for professional advice?” The answer, please take this in, is under 40% even in the highest levels of our rockstar companies. I ask what the impact has been of having a mentor (or sponsor)? I “wouldn’t be where I am today”, “my mentor challenged me,” “he believed in me, changed my life” “kicked my a — and showed me where I needed to grow,” and so much more).

My next question is “How many of you currently mentor other people?” Always under 20% stand up. WHAT@!#! Most companies err in believing mentoring should just happen holistically. I believe more and more we need to engineer it in a dynamic fun way with creative flexibility. I believe people are afraid to look weak in asking for help or intrusive in offering help. But the help of each other is the bridge where magic occurs.

We also are confronting a loneliness epidemic in our country and it’s hitting our youngest the hardest. It’s not just “lonely at the top” anymore. In fact, recent overall studies that show that 54% of American’s feeling lonely and isolated.

Darren stood up at the conference after a flash mentoring session. He had a management problem that was nagging him for weeks related to his new promotion. “I was concerned about it every waking moment,” he shared. He found his answer and began action planning following a speed mentoring conversation with a seasoned leader. “When he was talking, chills just went over my body,” said Darren at the conference. “I knew he was right and I had gone to my manager and others, but he was the one who made me see a solution I hadn’t seen.”

Nice to have or have to have? I have the time or I don’t have time is the question you will have to answer for yourself and your company. … and having a leader like Cheryl at the top quadruples the chance of systemic success.

For your own time, if you go with “Yes” I will carve out 10–20 hours a year to mentor others or ask for help, get started. Schedule that walk and talk or that drive to Peet’s Coffee.

“Mentoring is a muscle you flex, it grows stronger the more you use it,” says Cheryl.

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Julie Kantor and her team at Twomentor are here to help you build or boost a sustainable mentoring initiative to retain your best talent. She can be reached at julie@twomentor.com 

Workplace Chaos? Good Time to Build Your Mentoring Efforts

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MWorkplace Chaos? Good Time to Build Your Mentoring Efforts

by Julie Silard Kantor

What happens when the leaders leave (or are replaced)? When the revenues are not resembling hockey stick performance? When a big company gobbles up a smaller company? When there is an 8% layoff of the workforce? People start feeling like their jobs might be on the line. They feel a new leader might not understand their contributions. They might feel someone is trying to steal their lunch. Culture changes. Isolation increases along with indeed.comsearches. Linkedin resumes get brushed up. Mistrust or toxicity seeps in.

I’ve heard it many times in my five years building mentoring initiatives. “Julie, with all the change, shouldn’t we wait until after XYZ to get started?” a top HR executive asked me.

In running both mentor training and mentee training, often the rising-star mentee is looking for someone who can help them navigate the new environment. Someone who will sit down with an iced coffee (or vape) for a chat, a safe haven to reflect on, ‘How do I best position myself in the midst of change?’ ‘How do I get off to the right start with my new boss?’ ‘How can I be part of the solution, when I am worried about how things are going financially?’

The mentor, often with more experience, might not have all the answers, but might have experienced more change in their tenure and likely will have new perspectives to offer up.

The mentor serves as a role model. They care about their mentees goals and objectives and can be instrumental in talking someone ‘off a ledge’ who is nervous. Encourager and challenger, the mentor often will help the mentee understand their role in better ‘owning’ their career trajectory and not being the victim in a who-moved-my-cheese environment that we are seeing more and more.

I was watching Good Morning America a month ago and the words ‘America’s Loneliness Epidemic’ crawled across the bottom of the screen. Curious, I Googled the UCLA research and It was eye-opening. Almost 1:2 Americans (20,000 in the study) stated that they sometimes or always feel alone, lonely or left out. Particularly hard hit are our youngest generations. How does that manifest in a workplace which is often a key pillar in our lives and psychological/financial stability? Read more HERE on the study’s findings.

In building s pilot-to-sustainable and scalable mentoring initiative, we create an opportunity for our workforce to not isolate. A world where people are recognized for helping-each-other. We engineer and hold the space for people to connect with morale-boosting support from the top. Employees have the learning conversations with structure in place.

When I ask hundreds of mentors in training what do people most come to them for advice on, the response is not ‘to complain,’ it’s usually:

1] to help them advance their career,
2] to learn how to network better,
3] to be better at people management, leadership and
4] to help them prioritize

With the fast-paced corporate growth and more predictable flux, do you want to wait for another season or reason to show your people you take a stand for them as they are a stand for each other?

Julie Kantor is CEO of Twomentor, LLC a high impact company that provides mentor strategy, execution, mentor training and mentee training, flash mentoring, business case keynotes and more.

LET’S TALK!
Scheduling Contact, Sophia@twomentor.com

When Your Mentor Isn’t Perfect: 5 Strategies For Bringing Out The Best In Each Other

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by Devi Jagadesan, Summer Associate at Twomentor

Nobody’s perfect, including our mentors that we look up to. Some of us are unorganized, lack communication, or simply get caught in the chaos of a difficult work schedule that we forget we have someone looking up to us as a role model. However, there is always room to improve as a mentor while bringing out the best in your mentee. According to Deloitte, Millennials planning to stay with their employer for more than five years are twice as likely to have a mentor (68%) than not (32%). Furthermore, according to a 2014 survey by The UPS Store, 70 percent of small businesses that receive mentoring survive more than five years – double the survival rate of non-mentored businesses. There is such a strong business case for mentoring, but these relationships can get derailed if not nurtured or if we have unrealistic expectations of each other.

1. Honesty and open communication

It is important in a mentor/mentee relationship to build the foundation early for how you both will give and receive feedback. Being transparent builds trust and more room for open communication. Make sure as a mentor, you listen closely to your mentee and get to know them both as a person and a professional. You are in a position to help your mentee build on her/his strengths while giving constructive feedback on areas your mentee can improve. I had a concerned mentor ask me often “Are you taking care of yourself,” as part of his dedication to self-care being vital in the workforce. His feedback was well received. If you go overboard with critical feedback, the relationship will most likely deteriorate. Good communication is key for a long-lasting mentor/mentee relationship.

2. Goal setting and task oriented

Part of being a mentor is helping your mentee on the journey toward achieving his/her goals. A lot of mentor-mentee relationships fail because there are no clarified objectives as the basis of the working relationship. It is important to go over the mentee’s goals on the first or second meeting and recognize milestones monthly or bi-monthly. New goals may emerge. Some mentors try to form their mentee into their own image, by having your mentee establish their own goals. Your job is to support your mentees vision and success while encourage them to keep the momentum moving forward.

3. Mutual respect

Your mentor or mentee might disappoint you personally or professionally. This can be very hard emotionally on the mentor/mentee relationship. Mentors and mentees must have mutual respect for one another but might have different values, and beliefs. Although a mentor usually has more experience than the mentee, being able to respect his/her mentee for their strengths and all they have to bring to the table is vital. When a mentor believes in the mentee, it gives them the courage and confidence. Likewise, when the mentee has respect for their mentor for their experience, skills, ability to guide, the mentor is more willing to help. The mentor has an abundance of knowledge to offer the mentee. Each individual will grow together. If you feel on either side that the person is unethical, we suggest you move on and not align yourself with them further.

4. Carve out time for each other

Along with having mutual respect, a mentor and mentee must allocate enough time for each other. Canceling and rescheduling too many meetings can really weaken the potential of the relationship. This goes back to the point of mutual respect and valuing the other person’s time. Although we aren’t perfect, and sometimes get lost in a sea of scheduling conflicts, the relationship between a mentor and mentee is an important priority. Carving out enough time for each other must be in the upfront plan, even if it is just for 3 – 9 months of meetings.

5. Ask each other LOTS of questions

One of the best parts about the mentor and mentee relationship is that there for room for growth for both parties and trust needs to be established early. Getting to know each other is important whether it is about one another’s work, family life, or favorite hobbies and dreams. Finding commonalities make the relationship stronger and more enjoyable for both of you. You do not want to be strangers with your mentee, you want to build a rapport that makes you excited to be on this journey together. The more comfortable you both are, the more questions you can ask each other for learning and growth. Sharing your life experiences openly is also important for your mentee to hear so they can learn from your successes and mistakes. Your honest insights will make your mentee feel safe in opening up as well.

Lastly, The mentor/mentee relationship is a learning experience. If you follow these five recommendations, it will only strengthen the bond. A bond is formed when two people are able to be their true, authentic selves around one another. So the best advice is BE YOU, flaws and all because that is how both parties will benefit and grow.

LET’S TALK!
Scheduling Contact, Sophia@twomentor.com

Are You Mentor-Able?

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Written by Julie Kantor and Karen Osborn, Twomentor

Moving into the challenging professional world is an intimidating journey but thankfully, it doesn’t need to be tackled alone.

Mentorship, from academic to professional settings, is an active and involved process, but the benefits are well worth the effort. According to a survey carried out by Micromentor.org, mentored individuals and entrepreneurs significantly outperformed those who don’t receive mentoring. Additionally, a study conducted by the American Society for Training & Development (ASTD) revealed that 75% of executives point to mentoring as playing a key role in their careers.

Makes sense! But what we view as a given (that mentoring is happening informally at our companies) is not actually a given. In fact, as we travel the globe running the Mentor Road Trip™ mentor training sessions, we have witnessed firsthand at women’s conferences, at leadership development conferences, at HR executive conferences, at conferences focused on Millennials and multi-gen workforce that well under 50% of attendees answer YES when asked this simple question “Do you have or have you had a professional mentor?”

So how does one go about finding and building a mentoring relationship? Here are five things to focus on when starting your journey:

  1. Be Proactive, Committed, and Clarify Your Needs

Mentorship can happen organically, but that is the exception, not the rule. In order to maximize your options, be diligent in figuring out what you are looking for and what your professional or personal goals are. Being passive causes way too much confusion in these budding relationships. Spend an hour and write down 3-5 goals. Reflect on how a mentor can best help you move your vision forward? In what specific areas are you looking for guidance? If you’re just looking for a mentor to advance you the next job, that’s not really mentoring. That’s sponsorship.

So where’s the love? People are so isolated at work, so hidden behind computer screens, often unclear how to navigate the professional seas riddled with jellyfish and mysterious sea animals. Asking someone to be a mentor is an investment in your well being… and theirs. A mentor can make you feel plugged in, connected again. That someone out there cares about you and your professional trajectory. This is a big ask that’s mutually rewarding. You need to invest too with your best foot forward. A study by the Journal of Organization Behavior demonstrates that mentored individuals reported having more satisfaction, career mobility/opportunity, recognition and an overall higher promotion rate than non-mentored individuals. A mentor can help you to develop skills, offer career advice, and enhance your network amongst other things, but you again, you first need to understand and determine your own aspirations in order to figure out what type of person will be the best fit. Once you have determined these goals, you can start thinking about your network for ‘fit’ or ask people for introductions. I [Julie] want to scale my company for example, so I started asking people I respect who would be a good mentor to help me specifically with scalability strategy for 3 – 6 months. Start simple, by inviting a prospective mentor for a cup of coffee, tea or lunch, and share upfront that you would love their advice on a few things. Think of this as a first professional date to determine if you can learn from this person, that they want to open up their mental world to you and make sure you have a good and honest rapport.

  1. Work on Being Very “Mentor-Able”

Mentorship is a multi-dimensional relationship, and the value of a mentor-mentee relationship comes from applicable knowledge being shared between the two. If you are unwilling to take advice, constructive criticism, or be flexible in your thinking, having a mentor will likely not be a good fit for you. Openness, candor, honesty, listening… all ingredients to this delicate recipe. When looking for a mentor, look for someone that you will work well with, and make sure that you are willing to do your part to be a good mentee. In fact, you will need to take a leadership role in many aspects of this relationship. A study by the National Institute of Health found that the five main characteristics of successful mentoring relationships include: reciprocity, mutual respect, clear expectations, personal connection, and shared values. One thing about being very mentor-able is that your mentor will be much more likely to want to introduce you to other people and keep you in mind for opportunities in the future that might benefit you. Additionally, your mentor might talk about you to other influencers down the line based on your willingness to learn, grow and follow up on good advice towards your goals. If you are headstrong and difficult to work with, your mentor might not want to invest as much time or put their reputation on the line on behalf of you. Never be late for your sessions/meetings.

  1. Focus on Your Relationship Structure

You will need to actively and regularly communicate with your mentor, shadow them if possible, and actively pursue educational or professional opportunities with them. We suggest at least one meeting a month for 60-90 minutes. We view in person as best, but a Skype, FaceTime or Zoom online coffee call is fine too. Better to see each other live and really focus… not have someone checking out the latest news on CNN or schedules their next teeth cleaning in the middle of the call. The success of your mentorship relies on the effort you put in, including good follow up, being on time, and don’t expect to find a mentor and have everything happen toward your goals overnight. One thing we see a lot at Twomentor is that people get together but it’s unclear who is supposed to lead the relationship. The mentor expects the mentee to reach out, or the mentee comes to a meeting with no specific questions, goals, or focus. There needs to be some structure, including clear objectives you want to focus on with your mentor. We suggest you write up a one-page vision of how you want to grow and specifics on how your mentor can help you with your goals. It is important that you come to your meeting(s) prepared and with specific discussion topics or questions you have. We suggest you set up your next meeting on the spot when you are together. Keep track of your work and actions so your mentor knows you are taking his/her time seriously and so you have clarity regarding your progress.

  1. No Challenge… No Real Growth

We saw a great quote on Pinterest today, “A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing grows there.” We often grow the most when we are in pain or challenged. If you are not willing to challenge your limits and expand your perspectives, you will not be able to get the most out of your mentor relationship. One of the most important aspects of mentorship is the ability to learn from the experience of your mentor, and apply their lessons to your current and future personal and professional situations. A mentor should continually challenge and push you in order to grow and develop both professionally and as an individual. There is much more value in honest feedback of your strengths and areas of improvements than there is in simple encouragement. Both are valuable, don’t get me wrong. A mentor will be more comfortable offering this type of feedback if they think you genuinely want it. So ask for it. Mentorship fosters personal and professional development, as noted by a Wharton/Gartner study on Sun Microsystems (2006), where employees who received mentoring were promoted five times more often than those who did not! Additionally, mentors and mentees both had 20% higher retention rates at the company… a WIN/WIN/WIN for the mentor, mentee, and the company better retaining good people.

  1. More Than One?

Some people refer to this as having an internal board of advisors. Different mentors have different strengths, experiences, networks, and perspectives. Therefore, they will serve as a mentor to you in different ways or on different priorities you want to focus on. For example, a mentor who is great for supporting creative ideas will help you differently than another who can guide you through business growth and financial planning. A study by the Journal of Applied Social Psychology on internal versus external organizational mentors found that mentoring relationships within an organization serve to provide mentees with career and psychosocial support, while external mentorship relationships focus more on networking and personal development. The better perspectives and different styles of mentorship you are exposed to, the more you will be able to adapt what you learn to your own personal and professional needs. When looking for a mentor, don’t disregard someone because they are not an expert in all of the areas you’re looking to grow in. Rather, find experts in different fields, and make a few of them your mentors.

There is so much more we can discuss on being mentor-able, but we want to leave you with one last tip.

Show the love (or gratitude). Do something nice for your mentor. Show appreciation each step of the journey. Bring him a Cappuccino, buy her breakfast, send a handwritten card reflecting on something you learned, say thank you. Good friends are worth their weight in gold. A good mentor might be a professional lifeline for you today or a bridge to your success tomorrow.

Four Key Benefits of Workplace Mentoring Initiatives

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Co-written with A. Crosser

Q: What increases employees’ education and learning; saves company high turnover costs; develops leadership and management skills; and saves people time and money to focus on the big priorities?

A: Workplace Mentoring

When examining companies and how they became remarkably successful, one trait which stands above many others: successful companies have excellent leaders, and with excellent leaders come excellent employees. Leadership and guidance is very important to success in nearly every field, and workplace mentoring is one way to provide personalized leadership for both new and tenured employees. Skills-based Mentoring is part of on boarding to teach new executives the company ropes and to help them excel and grow as they continue their position.

Mentoring programs are becoming increasingly popular in workplaces, as they help in reducing turnover, promoting growth, and overall help employees adjust to new positions as well as become prepared to move up in the company. We shared earlier that over 79% of Millennials see mentoring as crucial to their career success. According to Chronus Corporation, over 71 percent of Fortune 500 companies offer mentoring programs, showing that mentoring programs are becoming a standard in many workplaces. This begs the question, why are so many successful businesses incorporating mentoring programs, and what benefits do mentoring programs offer?

  1. Education and Learning

There is no debate that educated, well-trained employees produce better results in the workplace than employees who lack knowledge and training. Nearly 80 percent of all learning is considered to be informal, meaning that it is not done by reading or taking classes, but rather by learning on the job and from others. By introducing mentoring programs, businesses can ensure that their employees are able to complete their work with knowledge of the field and their position. Mentors will elevate and escalate “knowledge transfer,” which is useful in shortening a learning curve in the workplace, meaning that companies can have highly-productive employees in a much shorter period of time then they would have had mentors not been implemented.

  1. Reducing Turnover Rates

One of the main benefits of mentoring programs is that mentors can play a major role in reducing the turnover of employees, meaning that the company will not have to invest in training new employees as often as they would with a higher turnover. Diversity & Inclusion leader Dresdene Flynn-White shared with us that the loss of one good employee costs on average a years salary. By providing personalized advice to a mentee, a mentor can help to ensure that employees will work through any frustrations or concerns they may have, help them build the skills they need for success, encouraging them to stay with the company and grow there for a longer period of time. By keeping employee turnover rates low, companies will continually have experienced personnel, rather than the burden of constantly training new employees to replace those who left.

 

  1. Development of Leadership and Management Skills

Having employees who are ready to step into management positions in the business with minimal training is highly valuable, as it reduces the need for external hiring, ultimately saving the company time and money. By implementing a mentoring initiative, mentors can assist in teaching leadership skills to employees showing potential for future leadership positions. In addition, mentors reduce turnover rates, meaning that providing mentors for high potential employees will improve the chances of them staying with the company long enough to progress into a leadership position, reducing the need for outside hires.

  1. Time Savings and Focus

Implementing mentorship strategies is an excellent way to save time in the workplace. By implementing mentors, employees with questions or concerns can often work with the mentor on a resolution or answer, reducing the time needed to get tasks finished, which overall improves productivity. Mentors also reduce the formal training necessary for new employees; by providing new employees with a ‘project-based’ mentor, they can learn on the job, rather than in a training room. Managers and bosses will can therefore spend more time working on tasks more imperative to the success of the company, making mentoring a win-win for the employees and the company leaders alike.

So bottom line, mentoring can be a WIN/WIN/WIN (for the company, the mentor, and the mentee) but it has to be imbedded formally into the culture of the company. A need to have, not a nice to have. Additionally, recognizing & valuing employees who take time to mentor and those who lead the initiatives needs to be on every HR and team leader’s priority list.

References:

http://chronus.com/resources/daimler-trucks-reinvents-corporate-mentoring-program

http://management.fortune.cnn.com/2012/04/19/peer-mentoring

http://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/article.cfm?articleid=1736

http://smallbusiness.chron.com/benefit-company-gain-mentoring-programs-20665.html#

https://www.virgin.com/richard-branson/the-importance-of-having-a-mentor-in-business

Julie Kantor is the CEO of Twomentor, LLC a management consulting firm that provides mentor training, strategy and global speaking to elevate women and millennials in STEM.

Mentoring Culture is Good for Business

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“I am leaving my company,” Bridgette, a very senior executive told us.

“We just don’t have a mentoring culture.”

In this world of GO, GO, GO productivity and massive technology dependence (or can I boldly go ahead and say, addiction), it becomes harder for people to take out time for each other. The ROI, the business case for mentoring is also not always clear to industry (ie. is it good? vs. is it good for business?)

“I just started here, and no one can explain to me how to use our Microsoft Lync platform.”

“I don’t know what I am being measured on and the other interns don’t either. I came here for experience.”

“I haven’t spoke to my hiring manager yet and its been 10 days.”

“Our girls need role models of women in IT.”

Concerns such as lack of time, lack of formal programming at the company, belief that one doesn’t have the skills to be a professional mentor are often cited for not engaging or saying “no” to this important role.

But the process of mentoring can be a great asset to the company. Both good for the people involved and good for the company.

In one Gartner/Wharton study, employees who mentored were promoted six times more often than their peers who did not mentor; mentees were promoted five times more; 25 percent of employees who mentor received a salary grade change in comparison to 5 percent of employees who didn’t. Lastly, employees who participated in a mentoring program had a retention rate 20 percent higher than those who did not mentor, and over 68 percent of mentors and mentees stayed at the company after five years.

Experiential learning is where it’s at. It’s one thing to hear about the world of work, it’s another thing to be swimming without a life vest in what feels like shark infested waters. A mentor can help their mentee enjoy the swim, dodge the jellyfish, jump up on a Jet Ski, and experience how not to just survive but thrive in a new career. Do you remember your first swim? Did someone champion you and help you navigate?

With the “I don’t have time to mentor,” concern. I can relate. This is why I am a big fan of internships and job-shadowing. I mentor about a dozen young men and women and feel our interns in the office get my best and more time. Short coffee breaks here and there work. Sure, we can sit in the conference room for 30 minutes after the staff meeting and go over your action plan for the week, vision and troubleshoot an area you are challenged.

Brandon Busteed at Gallup said “Mentor Duty is the new Jury Duty,” and also taught us that there is a big big (actually huge) divide between how prepared college Presidents believe their students are for work and how corporate leaders feel.

I do believe it’s our civic duty to teach, mentor and hopefully sponsor when interns come to learn. Online mentoring coupled with face-to-face works too. Thanks to our visionary CEO we hire many of these interns as part of an on-boarding strategy and we are able to test drive talent to see if a good fit for our company and culture.

And by the way, they reverse mentor me on collaboration, technology, use of social networks and so much more.

YOLO. JUST DO IT. Start now with just 30 minutes a week. I don’t know how else to put it, we all want to work for a company that has a mentoring/coaching culture. Those companies will retain their workforces significantly more.

In a non-mentoring environment people tend to swim in fear, visualize the fins around, likely want to leave, or worse join the silent majority who are not engaged in their work and drift through their days. That is not good for business.

Julie Kantor is the CEO of Twomentor, LLC. Follow her @JulieKantorSTEM She writes ongoing blogs on STEM, Entrepreneurship, Education and Technology for Huffington Post HERE

A Resource to help you get started . Here is an action guide geared toward mentoring in areas of Science, Technology Engineering and Math.

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